X. 15: PEDITUMX. 15: THE FART
Martial (M. Valerius Martialis)trans. Raymond Geuss
Cedere de nostris nulli te dicis amicis.You claim to be my best friend,
sed sit ut hoc uerum, quid, rogo, Crispe, facis ? but I see no evidence of this:
mutua cum peterem sestertia quinque, negasti, when I need money,
non caperet nummos cum grauis arca tuos. you refuse to lend it;
quando fabae nobis modium farrisue dedisti,you've never yet invited me to dine;
cum tua Niliacus rura colonus aret?I can't remember when you last
quando breuis gelidae missa est toga tempore brumae?did me a favour or helped me out.
argenti uenit quando selibra mihi?Your friendliness amounts to this:
nil aliud uideo quo te credamus amicumyou fart when I'm around
quam quod me coram pedere, Crispe, soles.without restraint.

Trans. Copyright © Raymond Geuss 1999, - publ. Hearing Eye


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